A woman chose to save herself over her baby while she was 3 months pregnant. Several months later, she can barely stand to hear her husband tease her about the incident even though the baby survived.
Marie walked into the pediatric clinic, looking disheveled, with her 5-month-old daughter, Claire, crying uncontrollably as she hung on the baby carrier.
She received the biggest scare of her life when she woke up that morning to find the baby with a high fever. Now, waiting in line with the other new moms to see the doctor did little to curb her panic. Claire’s constant wailing only worsened her plight.
Truth be told, Marie had enough on her plate even without dealing with Claire’s illness. Funny how her husband still hadn’t shown up at the hospital despite informing him about the situation that morning.
As she reached for her phone one more time to see if Josh had called, she noticed her fingers. fidgeting. She could barely hold on to the phone. Immediately, she broke into tears, letting out the pent-up emotion she’d kept bottled up this past week.
“Do you need a hand?”
She looked up to find a young mom staring down at her. Marie immediately tried to regain her composure as she nodded a “no” smiling. But she did need help.
With a determined sigh, she resolved not to let herself panic again. It wasn’t helping anyone. It hadn’t helped her eleven months ago. Flashes of the darkest night of her life replayed in her head, going into overdrive.
She had been three months pregnant, driving an ATV along the terrace when the stray school-bus drifted off the road and struck her vehicle. The last thing she remembered was kids screaming.
Waking up at the hospital moments later, she saw herself being wheeled into the emergency room in a stretcher, with Josh’s face right over hers, in tears. He was speaking, but she could barely make out the words.
Marie looked around her to find blood gushing out from various parts of her, and then the pain hit her uncontrollably. She was dying, she could feel it on the inside.
In a state of panic, she grabbed the doctor’s hands, looked right into his eyes, and begged him to save her at all cost, even if it meant prioritizing her life over the baby’s.
Gladly, both mother and baby survived the emergency surgery. But that wouldn’t be the last of it. Six months later, she welcomed Claire. Her love for the little bundle of joy knew no bounds. She could hardly imagine herself choosing anything else over her daughter, not even her own life.
But she did eleven months ago. Although no one blamed her openly for choosing to save herself in a state of panic, relatives teased her about it constantly, which made her feel terrible.
She couldn’t live with the thought of her selfish decision and only wanted to forget that moment. But it was impossible, especially with Josh finding the scenario funny and teasing her with it despite incessant warnings for him to stop.
He stopped mentioning it for two months but brought it up again a week ago when she asked him to clean up after breakfast since she was tired from staying up the previous night to look after their baby.
That was the last straw. She yelled at him, grabbed her things, and moved back to her parent’s house with the baby. Her husband insisted he only mentioned it to cheer her up, and Marie’s dad agreed with him.
Josh kept pleading for her forgiveness, begging her to come back home. However, she gave an ultimatum of forgiving him only if he swore by his ancestors to never mention the hospital incident again.
This sparked outrage among his relatives, who thought her comment disrespectful. Now everyone seems mad at her for wanting some sort of conviction. But it’s her life right? Her terms.
WHAT I THINK
Indeed, it is Marie’s life. But I think she went a little overboard by asking her husband to swear by his ancestors, or by anything truly. Even the good books frown against swearing.
But there is nothing wrong in wanting some sort of assurance, especially since Josh had made promises about it before, and failed. So don’t beat yourself up for your actions Marie.
It is also unfair for anyone to tease the new mom over something she did or said at the brink of death. Being only three months pregnant, the baby wouldn’t have survived anyway if Marie didn’t. Hence, even the doctors would have prioritized the mother’s life without her demanding it.
There is no point in feeling guilty about being logical or making a rational decision at the point of death. So unless they’ve found themselves in those shoes before, no one has a right to judge.
What’s important is that Marie developed those motherly instincts as time went by. And even better, turned out to be a loving and devoted mom to Claire.
What do you think? Would you have chosen a different part if faced with Marie’s situation?
